Tributes for Life
Here is the link for writing letters of condolences.
http://condolencewords.com/1/condolencemessages/
Here is the complete article from the said site:
At some point, each of us will know a friend or family member suffering the loss of a loved one. In their time of need, it is natural for you to want to offer your condolences as a way to help comfort them. A letter of condolence or sympathy is a simple gesture we can make to let them know they are in our thoughts as they traverse this difficult time in their life. The grieving process is a complex set of emotional stages, and letting someone know that they are not alone can help to minimize the impact their recent loss has on their life. While a letter of condolence is a simple gesture of love and kindness, composing one can be a difficult undertaking. The fact that you want to write a letter of condolence shows that you know the fragile state of your friend or loved one. Saying the wrong thing can often have a worse effect than saying nothing at all. When offering your condolences it is important to speak from your heart. Your heartfelt words will be personal and may help take the grieving person’s mind off their pain, if only for a brief moment. If you have ever suffered a great loss, you know that every moment your mind is on something other than your loss is a moment of relief and relaxation. Many of us worry that our letter will do nothing to ease the pain of their loss, or that we will say something in the letter that will only make things worse. By following a few simple guidelines, you can make your letter personal, convey your deepest sympathies, and offer a bright spot in the grieving person’s suddenly darkened life.
Most people who sympathize with someone whose loved one just died only show up during the wake and the funeral. While they think of their grieving friend, they are not sure whether or not making a call or dropping by after the funeral is still necessary. Others assume that the grieving would prefer to be left alone in the meantime. While some may prefer to have their “alone time” after the funeral, there are others who appreciate some company, even if it is just in the form of condolence messages sent by family and friends who cannot be present at the moment.
Sending in these kinds of messages are not limited to long distance friends and relatives. Even if you have attended the funeral, and was there during the wake, sending a message a week after, and making calls a few weeks later will be greatly appreciated, even if the bereaved turns down your offer for help or request to meet up. Knowing that someone thinks of him/her, and that you are willing to get out of your way already gives him/her comfort.
Condolence messages and sympathy messages need not be too spiritual or profound. It only needs to offer comfort in a way that does not try to minimize the pain that the bereaved is going through. Suggestions to “move on with your life without him/her” does not help nor provide comfort. Understand that the surviving family members are in pain, but do not wish to forget their loved one. In fact, most of the foundations established are formed in memory of someone who died. Write a message about how their loved one has touched your life, how he/she was as a friend or a colleague. Tell them about what his ideas were, what he wanted to achieve, what were the dreams that he shared with his friends. Seeing his life through his friends’ perspective will somehow bring comfort to the deceased family, and maybe it will momentarily make them smile. As the years pass, when they read through your words of sympathy again, it will bring peace and healing.
Here is a sample condolence message that is written on a very light tone:
Dear (name),
I am sure you are missing (name of deceased) everyday. I do miss him too. If he could talk right now, I’m sure he will rib me on what a crybaby I am.
This is just to let you know that you are in my thoughts, and I am free this Friday evening. If it’s ok with you, I can drop by and bring pizza and pasta for you and the kids. I’ll be keeping in touch soon.
Another sympathy message example:
Dear (name),
I am sorry to hear about (deceased name)’s death. We are still in shock, especially that we just had the hiking trip last weekend. I remember that we were already planning for the next hiking trip, and he already had more people in mind to take to the trip.
I cannot imagine the pain of losing a spouse, much more at the peak of his career. We will definitely miss him. Our colleagues are also extending their deepest sympathies to you and your family.
I have inserted some of our weekend hiking photos with (deceased name). I hope his smiles will somehow bring back good memories.
You and your family will always be in my prayers.
I hope this can help ease somebody else's pain
Here is the link for writing letters of condolences.
http://condolencewords.com/1/condolencemessages/
Here is the complete article from the said site:
At some point, each of us will know a friend or family member suffering the loss of a loved one. In their time of need, it is natural for you to want to offer your condolences as a way to help comfort them. A letter of condolence or sympathy is a simple gesture we can make to let them know they are in our thoughts as they traverse this difficult time in their life. The grieving process is a complex set of emotional stages, and letting someone know that they are not alone can help to minimize the impact their recent loss has on their life. While a letter of condolence is a simple gesture of love and kindness, composing one can be a difficult undertaking. The fact that you want to write a letter of condolence shows that you know the fragile state of your friend or loved one. Saying the wrong thing can often have a worse effect than saying nothing at all. When offering your condolences it is important to speak from your heart. Your heartfelt words will be personal and may help take the grieving person’s mind off their pain, if only for a brief moment. If you have ever suffered a great loss, you know that every moment your mind is on something other than your loss is a moment of relief and relaxation. Many of us worry that our letter will do nothing to ease the pain of their loss, or that we will say something in the letter that will only make things worse. By following a few simple guidelines, you can make your letter personal, convey your deepest sympathies, and offer a bright spot in the grieving person’s suddenly darkened life.
Sympathy Messages
Sending in these kinds of messages are not limited to long distance friends and relatives. Even if you have attended the funeral, and was there during the wake, sending a message a week after, and making calls a few weeks later will be greatly appreciated, even if the bereaved turns down your offer for help or request to meet up. Knowing that someone thinks of him/her, and that you are willing to get out of your way already gives him/her comfort.
Condolence messages and sympathy messages need not be too spiritual or profound. It only needs to offer comfort in a way that does not try to minimize the pain that the bereaved is going through. Suggestions to “move on with your life without him/her” does not help nor provide comfort. Understand that the surviving family members are in pain, but do not wish to forget their loved one. In fact, most of the foundations established are formed in memory of someone who died. Write a message about how their loved one has touched your life, how he/she was as a friend or a colleague. Tell them about what his ideas were, what he wanted to achieve, what were the dreams that he shared with his friends. Seeing his life through his friends’ perspective will somehow bring comfort to the deceased family, and maybe it will momentarily make them smile. As the years pass, when they read through your words of sympathy again, it will bring peace and healing.
Here is a sample condolence message that is written on a very light tone:
Dear (name),
I am sure you are missing (name of deceased) everyday. I do miss him too. If he could talk right now, I’m sure he will rib me on what a crybaby I am.
This is just to let you know that you are in my thoughts, and I am free this Friday evening. If it’s ok with you, I can drop by and bring pizza and pasta for you and the kids. I’ll be keeping in touch soon.
Another sympathy message example:
Dear (name),
I am sorry to hear about (deceased name)’s death. We are still in shock, especially that we just had the hiking trip last weekend. I remember that we were already planning for the next hiking trip, and he already had more people in mind to take to the trip.
I cannot imagine the pain of losing a spouse, much more at the peak of his career. We will definitely miss him. Our colleagues are also extending their deepest sympathies to you and your family.
I have inserted some of our weekend hiking photos with (deceased name). I hope his smiles will somehow bring back good memories.
You and your family will always be in my prayers.
I hope this can help ease somebody else's pain
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